Happiness—a seemingly simple word that resonates deeply for many people. Yet, it often feels so fleeting or entirely elusive. Many people are stuck in a false idea that permanent happiness is a possibility and that when I've attained it all will be good in my world! What does it really mean to be happy? Is happiness just a temporary feeling, or can it be a lasting state of being? Today my blog post explores the nature of happiness, its given meanings, origins, and ways to enhance our understanding in this ongoing quest.
Defining Happiness
At its core, happiness is obviously a personal experience. Different cultures and individuals define happiness in different and distinct ways. For some, it is about moments of joy, like celebrating a birthday or achieving a goal. For others, happiness is rooted in a deeper sense of fulfillment and life satisfaction.
Research identifies two main types of happiness: hedonic and eudaimonic. Hedonic happiness focuses on seeking personal pleasure, comfort and safety and avoidance of pain, while eudaimonic happiness emphasizes personally meaningful experiences and living in line with one's deepest authentic values. Several studies have determined that people who prioritize eudaimonic pursuits report being 40% more satisfied with their lives. Understanding these dimensions of happiness can maybe help us appreciate its complex nature.
The Pursuit of Happiness Through Time
Throughout history, our pursuit of happiness has changed. Ancient philosophers, like Aristotle, believed that happiness is the highest goal of human life, achievable through virtuous living. In contrast, today's society often equates happiness with material success and public acclaim, leading perhaps to a skewed view of what it means to be truly happy. It must be emphazised that there is no right or wrong way to be. But while the individual is looking to a society to set its standards for happiness it will be forever seeking an unattainable goal (the goal posts are forever changing :)).
Cultural narratives also obviously shape our understanding of happiness. For instance, Western cultures typically emphasize individual achievement, while many Eastern cultures prioritize collective well-being. This means that a person might feel fulfilled in community service in one culture, while another might feel fulfilled by personal success. Such differences influence how we seek happiness, making this exploration even more important.
We are all genetically wired differently and conditioned in different ways, each one of us innately has our own flow, our own jam, which can be difficult to tune in to when surrounded and bombarded with an infinite array of conceptual ideals for 'happiness' that are continually proffered. "Children will make you happy"..."Success will make you happy"...."Giving to others will make you happy"..."Being kind, living virtuously will make you happy"..."Being slimmer and more beautiful will make you happy"..."Having more energy and feeling well will make you happy" ..."Connecting to your Soul will make you happy" etc...etc...etc...
The Neuroscience of Happiness
Modern science continues to explore our understanding of what happiness is. Neuroscience proffers that happiness results from a mix of biological, psychological, and environmental factors.
Brain chemistry is said to play a large role. Neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin boost feelings of pleasure and satisfaction. Interestingly, research has indicated that about 50% of our happiness level is determined by genetics and only 10% comes from external circumstances—like our careers, relationships etc. To me this suggests that our perceptual mindset (set by genetics & conditioning) influences our happiness levels more than life experiences themselves! which makes sense as 'how' our brain perceives experiences obviously determines our 'happiness' levels.
The wine glass is either half full of wine or half empty, depending on your personal interpretation! But you don't choose how you interpret experience. Your brain does it automatically!...and a person who views life from a glass half full perspective is no better or more than a person who views life from a glass half empty perspective, they are just wired differently. They would probably say "No. no I 'choose' to see the glass half full". No they don't, the brain does.
Of course we can use self help practices, meditation, gratitude practices etc... but it is obviously the brain that equips the person with the motivation to do what they need to do in order to help themselves.
They don't consciously choose to not help themselves! Motivation arises from the brain or it doesn't.
Individuals who suffer severe genetic forms of chronic depression, such as melancholic depression, aren't choosing to perceive their reality through a dark, suffocating lens. And people who have no awareness of the condition can often think it is self inflicted or just a case of 'cheering up' or 'looking on the bright side' or 'cultivating gratitude'. This kind of 'help' can be so damaging as the individual suffering depression already feels shame for it, they often feel they are doing life wrong and its their own fault.
Common Misconceptions About Happiness
Despite ongoing explorations, misconceptions about happiness still abound. One major myth is that happiness is a fixed destination. Many believe, consciously or unconsciously, that once happiness is attained, it will last forever. In reality, happiness comes and goes like every other fleeting emotion, our emotions fluctuate daily.
Another huge misconception is the belief that happiness relies entirely on external factors—such as relationships, success, or wealth. When A, B or C happens.....then I'll be continuously happy! While circumstances can obviously contribute to happiness they can never be fixed so they can't be relied on. Nothing lasts forever, everything is in continual flux and change. Fully enjoy it while its here! What comes...goes...this is the nature of life.
All we really want deep down is the contentment of not seeking the moment to be any different than it is!..."Who'd have thought!" :)....
Practical Steps
Though understanding happiness can seem complex, practical steps can enhance your overall sense of well-being. Here are two key strategies to consider:
1. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness techniques, like meditation or yoga, can help individuals stay present and not be dragged in to tornados of thoughts. These practice can enhance how the unfolding moment is experienced and reduce anxiety caused by believing mental 'imaginings' about the future.
2. Nurture Relationships
Building strong, meaningful, nurturing relationships with people you love to be around can enhance happiness. Investing in family and friends can create a sense of belonging if you love to be around people. For example, having just one close friend you can deeply share your dreams, struggles and aspirations with can boost happiness levels significantly. Building nurturing relationships with animals and nature can also boost joy and happiness.
The Role of Societal Expectations
As I previously mentioned society hugely shapes how individuals understand and pursue happiness. Pressure to conform to external standards—like career success, relationships, or possessions—can distort our perspectives. We can be craving things that deep down are not even our true desires, because we've been brainwashed by manipulative advertising campaigns to want what they want us to want!!!. They are designed to impact individuals at the subliminal level.
It's vital to recognize that happiness is a personal journey. The tendency to compare ourselves to others can lead to dissatisfaction. "Comparison is the thief of joy!". Redefining success and happiness on our own terms can be incredibly liberating and transformative.
Get to know yourself deeply, find what floats YOUR boat, What is YOUR jam? do more of that!
Connecting Happiness with Meaning
Exploring the nature of happiness also requires considering the connection between happiness and meaning. While pleasure can offer short-term, fleeting joy and excitement, true fulfillment often comes from living a life driven by a deeper authenticity. Being true to your own heart in EVERY moment. Not driven by the expectations of others or 'society'.
Philosophers and psychologists emphasize that pursuing deeper, authentic personal meaning—even during tough times—can lead to a richer life experience. Identifying your deepest motivations and personal values and aligning your daily actions with them can create a profound sense of happiness and contentment that lasts.
Embracing the Journey of Happiness
The essence of happiness is a complex aspect of human life, obviously open to infinite interpretations. While practices like mindfulness, nurturing relationships, and pursuing meaningful goals contribute to well-being, the journey is ultimately entirely unique and personal.
Understanding happiness and deep contentment as a process of ever deepening self awareness—and not a fixed point—can relieve pressure and create pathways for expansion and deeper exploration.
Recognizing the complexity of happiness enables us to engage in meaningful conversations that hopefully foster understanding and connection—vital elements in this intricate dance of life.
This is not a one size fits all reality.
We are all so unique and an absolutely integral part of the whole.
The most natural and authentic expression of yourself, you being true to you (not always easy :)), paves the way for a life of contentment, not always happy, but profoundly content and at peace!.....
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