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  • Writer's pictureMelanie Barrett

The inner journey of Awakening

Every human (unless self realised and fully integrated with Soul essence - which lets face it are few and far between) perceives their reality through a core wound of unworthiness. My intuitive feeling is that the core wound IS the vibration of the lie of the illusion of separation. It is mostly an unexpressed, uncomfortable lie that the human ego is created over the top of, like a massive elephant in the room, that everyone can feel but can’t see :). To feel separate from the infinite, pure light of Source, from each other, naturally feels wrong because it simply isn’t true. 

Humans for the most part are simply projecting their core wounds out in to their reality. We are perceiving our own subconscious mind through our projection on to others. We are projecting (subconsciously) our own fears on to our reality. What I worry you can see about me that I’m even afraid to look at let alone admit to, I will project on to you (reality) until I admit, acknowledge and heal it within myself. While the human is asleep and unconscious to its subconscious programming the only way that life can bring our awareness to our painful and limiting subconscious beliefs is through projecting them onto our experience.

We are perceiving what we are believing. It is a complete 180 degree turn from how we have believed reality to be. The average human ‘believes’ what it perceives!

First is our belief. That belief creates perception. Life is an INSIDE job.

Our perceivable reality; our thoughts, feelings, images and sensations are a projection of our own psyche. Literally everything we ‘think' is happening in our reality, is in our own mind. Reality just IS…without translation or interpretation. Of course there isn’t anything wrong with interpretation, it happens by itself, however to realise that any translation is your ‘personal’ interpretation is liberation. Here is empowerment and sovereignty.

The core wound of ‘wrongness’ or not ‘enough’ as I am, in the human, feels so uncomfortable and unsafe. It is a fear of being truly seen for fear that your feelings of inherent and mostly subconscious unworthiness can be perceived by ‘others’. The human is terrified of its feelings of inherent unworthiness being exposed, ‘called out.’ The human even tries to run, hide and delude itself from its core wound of unworthiness. It tries desperately to manifest a life that protects and barricades itself from ever having to actually face and feel the insidious toxic guilt and shame. 

Even a ‘spiritual’ ego is built to defend and protect the human from its darkest, ugliest truth.

If any other human or situation even goes near to exposing that wound (that inner self loathing and existential doubt and fear) it immediately goes in to attack and defend or run :).

The nervous system is like a minefield of sensitive reactivity, providing a heads up to the body each time there is risk of the ugly truth of the inherent core wound of ‘unworthiness’ being exposed.

The ego is created and fortified in an attempt to keep us safe from ever having to encounter the ‘CORE WOUND OF UNWORTHINESS.’ This wound is the reason that necessitates the creation of the ego in the first place. The ego is just a conglomeration of beliefs of A. - The ‘lack’ or ugly beliefs about ourselves and life that we’ve inherited and accumulated (genetically and through conditioning) - (shadow). And B - The beliefs of how ‘me’ and ‘my’ life needs to be perceived by others to counteract the ‘unwanted’ or ‘undesirable’ beliefs (light). The ego or little ‘me’ needs the world (others) to see me as the opposite of my shadow. Then I don’t have to face it. The ego desperately needs others to perceive only my ‘light’ side. The ego has a very difficult job to do. It protects us to the death (literally) from any perceivable threat to being exposed in any way shape or form to our shadow (dark side). It works very hard to maintain the projection of the ‘light’ side.

The wonderful Truth is that you are neither light or dark AND simultaneously both! However the delusion of dark needs to be authentically acknowledged and deeply felt to come to this liberating knowing….Being.

The core emotional wound of the human is no different to a physical wound. When a physical wound hurts and throbs, that is nature (our innate intuition and intelligence) trying to bring our attention to something that needs to be healed. If we cut ourselves and have a wound on our hands we have the hand stitched so that the skin can heal. If we don’t attend to (give our attention) to the physical wound it has the potential to fester and infect the entire working system. We don’t feel shame for being physically wounded (usually). We just heal the wound.

The same principal needs to be adopted with regards to our core emotional wounds. Each time we are triggered or feel an emotional pain and throbbing in our emotional body this is our innate emotional intelligence trying to bring our attention to an emotional wound. But most of us have not been educated about our emotional needs. We’ve been educated plenty about our physical needs. We hold a deep shame about having emotional wounds. Only because we have for the most part, been advised by people who just didn’t know how to take care of their own emotional wounds. Maybe we’ve been told ignore them, avoid them, keep busy and it’ll go away or sort itself out! Imagine applying the same healing strategies to a broken leg “Oh, just crack on, put a smile on your face, go and smell the roses, only be aware of the beautiful things in life, be in ‘gratitude’” Ha, ha, ha your leg would go gangrenous and literally fall off…but hey that’s ok because only love is real ha, ha, ha. This is obviously toxic positivity and it’s rife through the spiritual community.

If a wound in the physical body is inflamed then EVERYTHING it comes in to contact with hurts like hell. This again is the natural intelligence trying to bring your attention to the wound so that it can be treated and therefore heal.

If a wound in the emotional body is inflamed then life by its perfect intelligence will create situations to bring our attention to the emotional wound, so that it can be given attention and therefore heal. Whatever feeling is triggered in your emotional body is ALWAYS perfect, it just wants to be acknowledged and deeply felt. So that it can heal. Feeling it IS healing and integrating it. Maybe you need to express the emotional pain, say it out loud. Bring the light of your conscious awareness to it.

By venturing through the inner terrain of the psyche. By being still enough, brave enough to bring the light of our loving conscious awareness in to all within us that has been in shame and shadow, we begin the Soul integration process. We stop running away from ourselves.

This really is a path home to Truth and unconditional love. The inherent guilt, shame and fear that the human has built so much protection around, to avoid feeling, simply isn’t true. There’s only unconditional love experiencing itself as every human form. We are all at our core…innocent. 

By simply facing and being with your deepest inner darkness…it dissolves and integrates….the lesson is learned…the Soul can now evolve. More of your Souls light can be released in to the body.

Eventually the root, the deepest existential core of unworthiness, the belief that we were ever separate from Source or Wholeness begins to be deeply challenged and therefore held, healed and integrated.

The subconscious and conscious can now begin to merge. There is then no longer a feeling of unease in separation. It is deeply realised that separation is just the ‘play’ of unity consciousness. This is already Christ or Unity consciousness (whatever word floats your boat).

All that remains is the pure unconditional loving light of infinity, unity consciousness experiencing itself consciously through all appearance.

Heaven and Earth as One.

The inner journey of Awakening to the highest Truth begins and ends with you.

Then you can start maybe enjoying life :)….it’s why we are here…to be ‘in love’ and deep Joy with EVERY aspect of our lives.

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